Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Addicted to Cancer

Just saw the CRAZIEST thing on Dateline: This woman convinced her entire community, including her 5 kids and best friends, that she had cancer. She spent 18 months collecting donations and having her friends pay for her to take trips... turns out she was faking. She convinced her kids she was dying!!!! Meanwhile, they had a video of her going to tanning salons and Walmart while she was supposed to be getting chemo?!!!

Meanwhile falling way behind the dateline, a similar situation had unexpectedly taken place in a small suburb in Bombay ranging further away from the suburb boundaries to what is better known as non existant. A girl named Priya became my ex girlfriend's friend through another friend and somehow convinced both these girls that her non existant boyfriend was suffering from cancer and just had a nooze full of days to survive.

I was returning from playing squash and as usual decided to crash at her place where i felt more home than anywhere else in the world. I had already begun munching on two heavily pounded triple layered cheeze sandwiches with absolutely zilch morsels of any kind of vegetables, when she came out with the palest face any gorgeous looking girl could ever wear.Yeah you're right! I mean what else could have happened? Definately she had not started to smoke!!..I mean..

Anyways so she starts telling me the story about this cancer kid, and yeah i am listening, thinking how i should maybe add a few pieces of tomato and cucumber and mix hot sauce, sweet onion sauce and spicy mustard sauce. That will taste just awesome. So the story kept going somewhere right above my head when she started telling me that that guy was obsessed with her poetry and that she has been writing to him and that he even stalks her but only because he is too embarrassed to show his "chemotherapy" induced self

WHAT???????
"YOU WRITE POETRY, YOU NEVER TOLD ME???..... i mean.. FUCK THE CANCER!!!!!"

So she continued doing so, till the day the dawn took his soul away. Yeah she was upset about the whole thing. She had just realized what the end of life meant- "D-E-A-T-H". Thats how her extremely lame and totally fake friend Shipali explained the feeling inside to me. But the funny thing was none of them had ever met this guy. I mean they had been emailing this guy who really was just Priya. I mean they wanted to go to the hospital to meet him but she did not allow them and they still never understood. It turns out that this Priya was just looking to make friends and would just do about anything to do so.
She even told my ex girlfriend that that cancer guy had left her an embroidered purse and an acoustic guitar for me.
By the time she had discovered the truth, she did not really give a fuck about the purse, but hey! I never saw my fucking guitar.

Its a totally crazy, mixed up and an imperfectly perfect unbalanced world
In some other place and some other time frame, I could have been a marine biologist or maybe just a tractor driver.
but the most i fear is life itself and how it can so easily tend to unwind.

…..and here there are people who are faking death or even worse, someone else's life and death.

Evil wears many different Halloween costumes!

Sometimes I wonder why do I feel nothing when i have killed an ant or ants for that matter
but have to think thrice before swatting a moth?

Peace and love

5 comments:

Rose said...

Poeple tend to seek desperate measures to get attention i gues.. Saaad!!!

..Me

aishwarya said...

hey,my gradmom faked cancer too...
she announced it to some relatives that she has cancer...she came up with her own story of her being the old sad lady suffering from cancer and all her close family upset about it but not talking to her about it so she shouldnt be upset and that its a secret which she found out so they shouldnt talk about it too much to anyone..but women talk..and soon the story came out...this faking cancer thing is very funny..........but nothing beats faking heart attacks.....really ought to see my grandmom do that...

Siddharth Adelkar said...

dude wtf is "definately"...not u atleast.

Siddharth Adelkar said...

hey btw, when we were kids; we knew of a girl who convinced her school that she had blood cancer. that was freaking crazy man.

Anonymous said...

hey
you never spoke about your ex girlfriend

whats her name?